Archive for the ‘San Francisco’ Category

AT&T Wants To Take The Easy Way Out

Many San Franciscans have waited a long time for utilities to move underground, at great expense of time and money to each homeowner who was lucky enough to have the utilities undergrounded in their neighborhood. The effort to underground utilities has made the city safer and cleared the skies of overhead wires.
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Now AT&T would like to nullify that effort by “upgrading” their services and placing utility boxes above ground, in every neighborhood of the city. AT&T intends to upgrade its telecommunications network to a high-speed data transmission technology referred to as “Lightspeed.” In July 2007 AT&T posted flyers in the Inner Sunset neighborhood notifying residents of its intention to install above-ground utility boxes.

Subsequently the San Francisco Planning Department issued an environmental impact report finding that AT&T could move forward with its plans. AT&T immediately requested a permit from Public Works to begin installation. However, the permit was appealed by a neighborhood organization forcing a hearing before the Board of Supervisors. The Board will hear the appeal at its meeting on Tuesday, July 29th. The Board has the authority to deny the appeal or refer the matter back to the Planning Commission for review.

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15 Gallons of Blood

Ask yourself:

1) Do I LOVE Zombies?
2) Would I like to support local filmmakers?
3) Do I absolutely NEED to see a movie where a free puke bag is handed out?

IF you answered yes, Yes, YES!!! Then please proceed to the Victoria Theater at 16th and Mission for a limited theater release of RETARDEAD!

Retardead the Movie

Retardead is a sequel to the heart-warming “Monsturd”. This movie has everything: an evil doctor, some mentally and mortally-challenged flesheaters, and the sexy Living Dead Girlz.

As I mentioned, they are handing out a limited amount of puke bags, which you may actually need in a few parts.

Last night they had a question and answer after the show.

When I asked how much blood was used, they said about 15 gallons. Now that’s art!

Smart(er) Parking in the Future

Parking Meter
[Photo by Nate Enyedi for Wikipedia.]

A few years ago, the Port of San Francisco wanted to study parking-use patterns at a third of the 950 meters it controls along the Embarcadero, using a technology developed by the SF-based Streetline Networks Inc. — little sensors glued to the street that transmit a wireless signal to a central database when a parking space is occupied or vacated. Now SFMTA has picked up the idea for another purpose: to (hopefully) make free spaces easier to find on the fly, by transmitting the data to a service you will apparently be able to subscribe to, according to this NPR story. (An iPhone app, perhaps? Maybe by the time it’s ready Apple will be done hosing their own servers.) The same sensors will be capable of monitoring the speed of traffic past the spaces, and that data will be transmitted as well. SFMTA intends to analyze the data they collect from this network, and based on that, they will set policies to adjust the price of parking in response to demand, aiming for a vacancy rate of 15%. (Expect a glacial pace on that, with lots of legislative bickering once it comes down to choosing actual prices. Dynamic server-to-meter price adjustments are a distant dream.) Reportedly San Francisco is the first city to reach this stage with the technology.

(Unrelated, but the question occurs to me: why do I have to rely upon the New York Times and NPR to bring me local news of this potential significance? And then the Chronicle wonders why they’re losing money.)

A Picture is worth at least 100 words…

THIS is one of the things I LOVE about living in San Francisco!

Right when I’m in a debate that has included some of the following items:

A) Public Health issues
B) Germs Spread by Humans
C) The EXTRA dirty things that happen IN San Francisco
D) Breaking the Law in San Francisco
E) Flyers posted on utility poles being illegal

…I’m walking to work… and while I’m following THE LAW (which is suddenly so important to some SFers) waiting for the light to change, I SEE THIS FLYER, POSTED TO A UTILITY POLE, illegally; detailing a beautiful example of the germ-spreading habits of humans.

In this case, someone else’s germs will be on someone else’s FACE for charity…

Ahh…. I love it…

Dirty Jock Strap Sale

** NOTE: For the record, I love that people are giving away their dirty jock straps for charity and have no problem with them posting their flyer. It is merely an absolutely perfectly placed example of some of the highlights of a previously posted blog. ***

Dogs Are People Too…

I washed my dog this morning, clipped his nails and got out the door to go see the vet for his regular check-up. Because I did not have any cash on me, I walked a little further to get coffee, to a place that takes cards.

I go in this place frequently enough. Though the “law” says dogs cannot go into food establishments, both of my closest coffee shops allow them. When I bring the pup in there, I carry him in my hoodie, just to be respectful of others.

Today, I go in and order a mocha and bagel to go. I have my dog on my shoulder.

I’m waiting for my food, when I get the feeling that someone is staring at me. I look around and my eyes land on one of the most foul specimens of human waste I’ve ever seen. Literally, this man is the human version of “Jabba the Hut”. He is a desending pile of tires of fat, rings of flesh telescoping towards the ground. He is shaped like a fleshy soft-serve, ice cream cone. His skin is yellow from jaundice and his eyes are bright red in the lids and whites, showing “Pink Eye” at the very least.

This foul man-pile yells at me from his stench-seat, “The dog goes outside”. I reply, “Are you the owner? I’m not leaving him outside.” I go back to waiting… “It’s the law” says flesh-sore-man, “Are you above the law? I’ll call the Board of Health.”

I grab my stuff to go and say to him loudly, so the whole cafe gets the message, “When you call the Board of Health, tell them you have a full-blown case of the infection known as “Pink Eye”, and that everything you have touched, including that stainless steel spoon someone else will later use, is infected.” I continue, “Tell them the money you gave the cashier, has now been handled by the same people handling the customer’s food. Tell them you have now exposed your infection to everyone in the cafe. Maybe you should think about THAT next time you worry about health codes…”

Do I need to take my 4th Anger Management class? YES.

Is it ridiculous that in San Francisco, an 8 pound, freshly-bathed dog is a health hazard, when in EVERY corner of this city, the average San Franciscan comes upon human fecal matter on every train, door handle, cafe, bathroom they use because this city is swarming with filthy, homeless crackheads?

YES, more than I need Anger Management, YES.

I pick my dog’s crap up, no matter where it lands. EVERY DAY when I walk to work, I dodge SEVERAL piles of human waste. The people who made those piles can go into any establishment they like. But I can’t bring my 8 pound, clean dog on my shoulder to get a coffee to go without having some ridiculous law spouted at me from Jabba the Jaundiced?

The LAW must GO!

San Francisco’s Smoking Section

These photos were taken from my friend, Cyan’s, backyard on Tuesday. The hills of Brisbane were on fire for while. The smell is lingering…

Fire in the Hills, photo by Cyan

Nighttime fire in Brisbane, photo by Cyan

A Warm, Relaxing Night with 23,000 Friends

The SF Opera’s free simulcast at AT&T park couldn’t have been on a more perfect night. As the opera ended near 11pm, it was still tank top weather! According to the Examiner, there were about 23,000 people there.

Here are some pix:

Free Simulcast at AT&T Park

23,000 fans watch SF Opera at the Park

The Ten Commandments of SF

In an effort to keep church and state separate I give you the Ten Commandments of SF!
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1. Thou shalt always vote on principal and not political party
2. Thou shall move your family to the suburbs when your children are of school age
3. Thou shalt always have an earthquake preparedness kit in your home
4. Thou shalt drive a hybrid car
5. Thou shalt always yield to a bike if driving, and a ped if driving/biking
6. Thou shalt not pay for muni
7. Thou shall hate the dodgers like the devil himself/herself. Unless of course you are a satanist. Then thou shall hate the dodgers like god himself/herself
8. Thou shalt be tolerant, to the point of absurdity
9. Thou shalt pickup after your pooch, homeless denizen, drunk buddy defecates
10. Thou shalt keep your winter clothes out of storage all summer long

See things differently? Let’s hear your commandments in the comments!

h/t to David at the LA Metblog.

90 Degrees and a Perfect Night for the Opera!

It’s going to be another warm night, so why not pack a blanket and picnic and head down the AT&T Park, tonight at 8pm!

The San Francisco will be showing a live simulcast of

Lucia di Lammermoor

…and it is FREE!

The park asks that you bring a blanket, if you intend to sit on the baseball field.

The simulcast will be projected in high definition on the park’s 3,200 square foot score board.

For advanced registration and more information;

Check out The San Francisco Opera’s Webpage

… and enjoy the weather tonight!

Are you ready to Raaaawk?

The new and improved Warfield Theatre at 982 Market street will be reopened and filling it’s seats soon!!

The Warfield has been a popular venue since the 1920s. It was featured in the music DVD, Slayer: War at the Warfield, filmed on December 7th, 2001.

The auditorium’s last show before closing was Phil Lesh, but Ticketmaster.com now has a list of shows ready to go on sale June 22nd, 2008 for September and October dates. Here’s a few:

ON SALE Sun, 06/22/08 10:00 AM

Sat, 09/20/08
Nick Cave & the Bad Seeds

Fri, 09/26/08
Rancid

Sat, 09/27/08
Rancid

(on sale in September:)
Sun, 12/21/08
Brian Setzer Orchestra

Tickets on Sale for the Warfield

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