From Foster’s Freeze on University. Note label: at least it’s Berkeley’s own Berkeley Farms milk!

There have been all these shootings in Glen Park — maybe now I’ll be able to get a table at this place.

There’s nothing wrong with the restaurants in San Francisco except that so many of them serve pretty much the same Northern Cal-Mediterranean menu.

Yeah, that’s what the whole “eating local” thing is supposed to be about, dude. It’s a Northern California menu because this is Northern California. I wonder if he goes to Paris and then writes that the only thing wrong with Parisian restaurants is that they all serve French food.

Meanwhile, this isn’t SF-related, but is on the topic of restaurant criticism. Courtesy Girl Friday: A wine expert hoaxed Wine Spectator magazine into giving an non-existent restaurant its Award of Excellence. Pretty funny.

Yesterday they arrested three people they say perpetrated three of the takeover-style heists, in which hoodie-wearing men enter restaurants at night, force employees and patrons into a back room, and clean out the cash register.

The Oakland residents were arrested Tuesday evening after they allegedly departed from their successful MO and knocked over a nail salon. Police were given a description of the getaway car, which they spotted, followed and stopped. Inside they found ski masks, guns and the money from the nail salon.

Among the arrestees was the getaway driver, a 20-year-old woman whom police said was the girlfriend of one of the bandits.

Contradicting Oakland Mayor Ron Dellums who said the string of robberies were a result of the poor economy, a police spokesman said “These aren’t guys who lost their jobs and got desperate… These are people who had access to guns and get off on the thrill of robbing people.” And the brother of one of the suspects commented:

He’s got no reason to be doing nothing like this. He’s not a drug addict, not in a bind, there’s no pressure situation. He was cool, man. He missed his calling: He should have been a basketball star. He’s an incredible basketball player. He don’t have no reason to be robbing no restaurants. That kind of (expletive) is serious and petty at the same time, you know?

Mugwumpin, the San Francisco theater company planning a trip to Cairo to a theater festival, will hold a fundraiser for the trip featuring the strange fruit on Saturday, Sep. 6 in Oakland. For more info, email info@mugwumpin.org.

Oakland residents, horrified that the crime wave hit upscale neighborhoods, demonstrated last night on yuppified College Ave. with candles and flashlights. The robbery took place several blocks west, on less yuppified Shattuck Ave. See a map on the Chronicle’s website of the summer crime spree.

Being robbed at gunpoint — that’s a good story to tell around the water cooler. But being made to lie on the floor at a Denny’s: yuck.

They got “a very small amount of money,” say the cops, but I have the feeling they just don’t want to encourage them. If they said they got $3000* then you’d have even more robberies. View a Google map of all the restaurant takeover-style holdups this summer.

* A figure I just made up, and not intended to be taken as the actual amount of money stolen.

I’m hardly breaking new ground by reviewing Zuni, but more and more, I’ve run into people who’ve lived in San Francisco for at least a couple of years and have never eaten there. My advice: invite some out-of-town guests to visit and take them to Zuni.

Zuni Café
1658 Market Street (btwn. Franklin and Gough)
415.552.2522

• What kind of food is it? Fresh, sustainably grown / harvested ingredients prepared in French and Italian styles.
• What can you get to drink? Full bar with some spins on classic cocktails (I like the balsamic bloody mary), a one-sheet wine list with a good breadth of choices, nice selection of non-alcoholic beverages.
• Would you eat there again? I do. Probably too frequently.
• Would you eat there once a week (or more)? Short answer: Absolutely. Longer answer: It’s a little pricey for weekly dining. That being said, you can spend under $30 by getting a burger and plate of shoestring fries. Unfortunately, they only serve the burger at lunch or after 10 p.m., but it’s completely worth altering your plans to eat at those times. The burger is wonderful.
• Would you go out of your way to eat there? Yes, yes, a thousand times, yes.
• Would you recommend the place to your friends? I have and will continue to do so.
• Would you take your parents there? The in-laws, even. I’d suggest going after 10 p.m., perhaps after a night at the symphony. Order the caesar salad and some raw oysters to start and the roasted chicken (Sweet Jesus, the chicken!), a burger and fries for entrées. Depending on how much you like your in-laws, I’d also advise a bottle (or three) of wine.
• Would you take a first date there? Absolutely. I’m not going to get along with any girl who doesn’t like the food here.
• Would you take kids? I suppose. Point of fact: the children I’ve seen eating at Zuni are some of the most well-behaved I’ve ever seen. My deepest thanks to those parents.
• Do they take reservations? Yes, and I would highly recommend making them. However, the limited bar seating is first-come, first-served and the full menu is available there.

What more can I say? I’ve never had a bad meal at Zuni. In fact, one night a couple of years ago, they made a truffle burger (hamburger patty studded with chunks of black truffle) that might have been one of my most transcendent burger experiences. I check the menu for that burger to this day.

Before you protest about a totally positive review, I must admit, the chicken was a touch dry the last time I had it, which merely brought it down to the level of a normal restaurant’s instead of head-and-shoulders better as is typical. But, for my money, Zuni is consistently one of the best eateries in The City and will continue to be one of my must-dine-if-you’re-in-San-Francisco restaurants.