^[1]For those of us fortunate enough to live in a house or apartment with its own parking, the phenomenon of getting up in the morning (or coming home in the evening) to find a strange car blocking your driveway is a familiar, and minor, annoyance. Minor, that is, if you have an extra 30 minutes to deal with it.

In San Francisco:

1. Call 553-1200, the Dept. of Parking and Traffic’s Driveway Tow Hotline.
2. Photo courtesy Irina Slutsky ^[2]

3. Press 1 for English (or other digits for other languages; Spanish and Chinese are also supported)
4. Press 1 again, then 1 a third time.
5. Report to the operator the location, make, model and description of the strange car, and give your phone number.
6. A meter maid will show up within 10-30 minutes. If you’re not already downstairs (which speeds everything up), he or she will phone you at the number you gave. Interestingly, the MM will ask you to open your garage to prove it is a working garage and you aren’t just messing with people.
7. The MM will only then call in a tow truck, which takes another 15 minutes.

Another thing I found out: the MM told me the car might have been stolen, as the rear window was punched out (something I hadn’t noticed) and the glove box had been rifled. Accg. to the MM, if the car had been reported as stolen, I would have had to wait until the police arrived to get the whole thing resolved — and that would have added at least another 30 minutes to the procedure.

Fortunately for me, there was no report on it. So they towed it away and I went on my way.

Now join me in singing the song of all unfortunate drivers whose cars have been towed (to the tune of “The First Noel”):

Towed away, towed away,
Towed away, towed away –
Where do you go when you’re towed away?